How to Feel Better

Taking time to cleanse and tidy the outer spaces of your life can make you feel more clear, calm, comfortable and in control. But did you know you also need to take time to cleanse and tidy your INNER SPACE to feel good in yourself and your life long term? 

Your inner world's an energetic space that's also prone to get messy with mental clutter (from overthinking, worrying, negative self talk, ruminating etc.) and emotional stuff (from unmet needs, past hurts, daily stressors, unexpressed feelings etc.) 

Whilst mainstream society often encourages you to push this stuff down and hide it away, this doesn't make it disappear. Instead it lives on inside of you, uses up valuable energy, and can leave you feeling sad, mad, bad, stressed, chaotic, and overwhelmed, which then impacts on other areas of your life. 

There's no two ways about it - if you want to feel better long term you HAVE to tend to your inner space to help you feel clear, calm, confident, balanced, well, and whole.  

​So, let's look at how you can begin to do this.  

Let go of Emotional Baggage    
Carrying around pent-up emotional baggage can affect every area of your life, from how you see yourself, what you do, your health, behaviour, and everyday choices.   

​If you want to feel better long term you have to find ways to release these pent-up feelings in safe and constructive ways, otherwise they can begin to weigh heavy on you and others.   

You can begin to release your pent-up emotions through journaling, art-making, dancing, physical exercise, or in trusted conversation with a loved one or friend. Or you can seek guidance and support from a counsellor, therapist, or guide to help you work thought it.   

​Each bit of pent-up emotion you feel and release creates more space, clarity, peace, freedom and vitality within yourself, which definitely helps you feel better long term. 

​Notice the Stories You Tell
​Constantly telling self-defeating stories about yourself and your life doesn't help you feel good.    

You might tell these stories without much thought, but they can affect your sense of self, your worldview and how you think, act and feel. 

Common stories include casting yourself as a victim in a cruel and punishing world; as a martyr who constantly suffers and sacrifices yourself for others; as a princess who always wants to feel special and adored; as a damsel in distress awaiting rescue. 

Or maybe you keep telling that story of how uncreative you are; or how you can't be, do, or have what you want; or how it's too late for you.  

Whatever the story is, it's important to bring it to light and explore how it affects you.  

When do you tell yourself this story? How does it make you feel? Is it true? How does it help and hinder you? 

You can CHOOSE to heal this story and create a new one that helps to uplift and affirm you.

​You might choose to become the heroine of your own great adventure, the queen of your own thriving domain, the wild creative who expresses herself boldly. 

You help to create, and shape, your life's story so why not make it a good one?

​Feel and Move Your Energy 
Ultimately, you're an energetic being. There are physical, mental, emotional, creative, sexual, and spiritual energies circulating inside of you.  

These dynamic energies need to be channelled and expressed, otherwise they can become stuck, imbalanced, stagnant, and blocked which can negatively affect your health and wellbeing.  

Trouble is, mainstream society favours mental energy so much that it's easy to live in your head. So, even when you try to express your physical, emotional, creative, sexual or spiritual side you can be stuck in your mind, rather than really being in the experience.  

If you want to feel more clear, calm, balanced, vital and whole you need to express all of these inner energies and experience them in your body. 

For most of us this is a practice, a lifelong one at that. But you can start by simply noticing how you use (or don't use) these different energies currently.

​Which energies do you express most? Which ones do you enjoy? Which, if any, feel challenging? Which energies would you like to express more? How could you do this? 

When you really experience these energies and keep them moving in your body, you naturally feel more clear, calm, balanced, lit-up, and alive, which again will help you feel better in the long term.

​Address your Thinking Habits 
When you have an issue or experience that make you feel sad, mad, bad, disappointed, anxious, frustrated or stressed how does it affect your thought processes?

Do you spiral off into negative thinking about yourself, your life, or others? Do you get stuck in mental loops where you replay, rehearse, or repeat the same information or scenario over and over again in your head? Do you fall into a victim mentality or start to beat yourself up?  

These ways of thinking can become habitual and rarely make you feel better about things. Instead, they tend to use up a lot of valuable energy, limit your ability to be present, hinder your ability to problem solve, and keep you stuck in painful emotions. 

If you want to feel better long term one of the BEST things you can do for yourself is to learn to observe your own thinking. You can do this through meditation, journalling, and bringing awareness to your thoughts in any given moment. 

Once you notice you're stuck in unhelpful thinking habits you can CHOOSE to do something different. You can think more helpful, accurate, or compassionate thoughts.

The more you develop mastery over your thinking, rather than allowing your thoughts to dominate you, the more in control you and better you feel long term.   

Be in Nature
You're a part of nature, and your inner self responds well to its rhythms, beauty, and life-giving elements. Whether you go for a walk, sit in your garden, or do some kind of activity, taking time to experience the outdoors can lift your spirits, blow the cobwebs away, shift your perspective, and help you relax. 

Feeling that you're a part of nature can be deeply healing, offering you a sense of belonging and hope that, again, helps you feel better in the long term.    

​I hope these words encourage you to tend to your inner life more often. Far from being selfish, indulgent, or unnecessary it's ESSENTIAL if you want to feel good long term. And when you feel good you help foster the wellbeing of the world around you, so it's a win-win for all concerned!

Love and magic, 

​You don't have to do this journey alone!
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